What happens when we are not grateful? “Gratitude Attitude” Changes Your Life
By: Maria Alejandra Pulgar
The proximity of the end-of-the-year Holidays has always called for gratitude, joy, love and peace. The intention of concluding the year with those elevated emotions, however, becomes more complicated with the realities of the world.
When information about wars, confrontations, challenges and disasters bombards us, it takes a strong character and spirit to withstand the punches and focus on the blessings that still happen even when they do not make it to the newscasts.
A study of Mayo Clinic in 2022 found that the lack of gratitude has a negative impact on the physical and mental health of individuals: heart disease, chronic pain, weaker immune system; insomnia, fatigue, anxiety and depression. On the other hand, when experiencing gratitude, the hippocampus and amygdala, the two main sites of the brain that regulate emotions, are activated, improving memory and bodily functions, like the operation of the immune system.
The tradition of celebrating Thanksgiving, regardless of the historic origin of the holiday, is an extraordinary moment to appreciate the blessings in our families’ lives, big and small. Transforming the holiday in our family into an opportunity to experience gratitude would bring countless emotional and physical benefits to everyone.
What happens when we are not grateful?
Schadenfreude, a borrowed word from German, meaning “harm joy,” defines the emotion that happens when you feel joy for the misfortunes of others. It is like a “reversed gratefulness”; you are grateful that a bad thing did not happen to you and happy it happened to others, especially if it was to someone you dislike. It is a dark, complex emotion that can be harmful, not only to ourselves but to our relationships. Who would like to feel that way? Surprisingly many people do, you can see it plenty on the comments sections in social media.
Studies have shown that schadenfreude “can be associated with negative personality traits such as envy, resentment, and aggression. It can also lead to harmful behaviors, such as spreading rumors, gossiping, or sabotaging others”. Additionally, research suggests that “schadenfreude can have negative consequences for mental health, including increased stress, anxiety, and depression”.
Schadenfreude creates “a vicious cycle of negativity” increasing a person’s unhappiness and a toxic environment that ends up affecting all relationships. People who experience schadenfreude in general have issues and insecurities that derive in other negative emotions and behaviors.
The consistent practice of gratitude is part of the methods used to prevent, control and break that cycle, improving the general well-being of the person, their surroundings and, why not, making the world a better place one person at a time.
How to get into a “Gratitude Attitude”
A study published in the Journal of the Personality and Social Psychology found that “individuals who regularly practiced gratitude experienced greater well-being, fewer health symptoms, and stronger social connections”.
Having a “Gratitude Attitude” increases happiness, optimism, strengthens bonds, reduces conflicts “and increases feelings of trust and support”. Keeping a gratitude journal, expressing openly gratitude for others, even in the small things and practicing mindfulness are ways to adopting the “Gratitude Attitude” and experience its benefits.
Thanksgiving is a particularly good time to focus on gratitude. By taking time to reflect on the blessings in our lives, we can shift our focus away from the negativity in the world and observe the positive. Just the fact that we are alive is a blessing to be thankful. It does not mean being mindlessly positive in a toxic environment but observing that we have a purpose every day; that we can improve our surroundings, that we can find solutions and that even complicated times also shall pass, even if it does not appear so now.
Gratitude is especially important within families. When we express gratitude to our loved ones, we show them that we appreciate their presence in our lives and what they do for us; giving them small gestures of appreciation, like a “thank you”, a nod or smile, can change someone else’s day. This can help to strengthen family bonds and create a more positive and supportive environment.
This holiday season, that begins with Thanksgiving Day, try to make a point on focusing on sharing gratitude gestures and creating lasting memories with those that surround you. Practice counting your blessings for real at the end of each day, and you will find that there are more than plenty to even share with others.
From the Doral Family Journal team family to yours our Gratitude and Blessings for your support this year.
Happy Thanksgiving 2024!!!